And we’re not too too far gone to turn back time. Shot between 20 when the gay bear events were already growing, but prior to political and technology trends that are not part of the gay bear vibe. Trump has not made nasty and rude a valid choice yet. Instagram is not yet creating daily things to compare to. They might be us, but enough little things give a sense that they are not of this moment. These images are clear and relatively modern. Mike at Tea Dance at the Boatslip July 12 2009
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So they relate and make a suggestion on how to navigate and typically will make an invitation. There is no pretending that some real jerks exist outside the sanctuary limits and that most of the bears have plenty of experience dealing with insecurities and other fallout of cruelty and rejection that came with trying a new social thing in the past. The bears posture less, try to stay away from shaming or challenging, and make an effort to keep the peace. Insecurities aren’t quashed, but acknowledged and constructively mentored, for example the fears of bigger guy who doesn’t have many opportunities to feel sexy on a dance floor, wants to but needs a little encouragement to get there and to wear the outfit they obviously see themselves in. The good attitudes are kiki’d and encouraged. Excited, optimistic, cautious at times, folks say what they are excited about, what they are a bit unsure on, and not one of them goes without acknowledgement. Muscle bears have been much discussed for their hotness and for the threat they pose, suggesting hierarchy.Īnd why shouldn’t micro acts of kindness aggregate as micro-aggressions do, but instead create the opposite of a hostile environment?įor a hot take on where the bears are (as in emotionally, not “I want to go where ….”), check in with the customary posting of arrival videos and messages posted by hundreds of bears while en route. The furries frequently make common cause and frequently attend. All American baseball bears nod to ivy educated commie pinko ones. Meanwhile others meticulously review the plan for every meal. Heels saved and packed away to wear first in Provincetown. Bears include the young and clueless to those almost unable to attend, they are so over it all. In this modern culture, even in 2021, they hold room for the romantics and the promiscuous semi-annoying people are more tolerated those with trauma - current or past - can be accommodated better and even find grace. The bears in these photos get most of it right. Those attempts to build a more inclusive, kinder, more nurturing environment was intentional and the result of organizers who worked hard, expanded slowly, set a tone and fought pressures to mimic things happening at mainstream events. And why shouldn’t aggregated micro acts of kindness form whatever one calls the compelling opposite of a hostile environment? Why wouldn’t all the little ways we can find more things beautiful or sexy in more ways aggregate into more and better connections? Why wouldn’t every minor act of inclusion aggregate into more connections and healthy relationships? And it’s likely that past a tipping point it snowballs. These micro acts of kindness are effectively the opposite of micro-aggressions.
As always, better things come from just doing whatever it is.Īnd that’s the spirit in these pictures from Bear Weeks between 20. Specht’s example is the positive vibe created by an unexpected “Hey great shirt,” from across the street Someone who just says, “You look great.” It’s good vibes without the demanding of them by the young and performative “good vibes only” legions.
He calls that space “a sanctuary,”that has brought his group back for 12 years. His description is a space where much happens with the best intentions. And no judgement,” which is not a given almost anywhere else.
He says they simply always, “feel so at ease. (Intro by Michael Goff, Editor) Paul Specht has been to many Bear Weeks in Provincetown with his inner circle of friends which includes a number of bigger guys. Next –> Gay Bear Photo Portfolio by Paul Specht